Dean had been in the hospital for 2 weeks. Two fucking weeks recovering from a pretty major surgery after being in an explosion back to Somalia. He had only been home for two days and now he was ordered to go back to base again. His scars hadn’t even healed up completely yet. How could Cas not be upset? How could he not be worried? Castiel was pacing up and down in front of Dean who was sitting down on the couch, his face buried in his hands.
“I am tired Dean, what the fuck am I supposed to do? I am trying really hard but this is fucking ridiculous! You can’t just leave again, you just can’t!”
“Cas, for the last time, it is not my fault! Do you think that I like this, huh? Newsflash, I don’t get to choose what I do, I am a soldier and this is what I do, I follow orders. Try to understand that I-“
“Yeah, right! Good for you! Then go ahead, kill yourself, is this what you want? Bullshit! You have just recovered from a major surgery, Dean! Your body has experienced major trauma, you need to give it what it needs to heal at the correct pace. Jumping back into your regular work routine will only hinder your progress!”
“What do you want me to do? I am doing this for you babe; I am doing this for us. This is my job and you know that we need the money, you are still studying and I can’t afford to lose my job, not right now! We can’t depend on your parents forever! You are an intern; you don’t have time to work and study at the same time!”
Castiel blew out a frustrated sigh and looked away. They’ve been over this. Again and again. He damn well knew that Dean was right. They couldn’t depend on his parents forever and he was still studying.
“We don’t talk to each other like this Cas!” Dean sighed and lifted his face to look at him.
“Yeah, right, we don’t!” Cas retorted, his voice dripping with irony.
Dean looked away for a moment and then just stood up, kissed Cas on the top of his head, muttering a quick “Good night”, before he walked out the living room and went upstairs to their bedroom.
Castiel watched his husband walk away with his hands clenched at his sides. He sat down on the couch and sighed heavily, running a tired hand over his eyes
He was so tired. They had been married for three years and he had yet to get used to seeing Dean leaving. He hated Dean’s job, he hated the fact that it kept him away for such long periods of time.
They never yelled at each other. He knew that Dean was right. But he was upset, worried and incredibly sad. His body could not contain all those feelings and he had literally exploded.
When he was calmed down, he slowly stood up and went upstairs to their room, hoping that Dean would still be awake.
He walked into their room quietly. Dean was already in bed, but Castiel couldn’t tell if Dean was sleeping or not.
He stood there for a moment, staring at Dean’s back before he shed all his clothes, slipped into bed next to Dean, and wrapped an arm around Dean’s waist protectively, pressing his body against his husband’s back. His fingers threaded into Dean’s hair, and he buried his face against the back of his neck, his hands gently exploring Dean’s well defined chest. He run his fingers over the scars on his chest slowly and closed his eyes.
He could have died. He could have lost him. He could have lost everything because Dean was his world.
“It’s not fair….” Castiel whispered and started pressing soft kisses to Dean’s neck.
“I thought you were going to die…You don’t know how it feels being here all alone, not knowing where you are, what you are doing…I could lose you any moment…I can’t live without you Dean. If anything happens to you I am going to die, I don’t know how to live without you baby…I am so sorry I yelled at you. It wasn’t about you…” he whispered into his ear and pressed a kiss to his temple before slowly rolling on top of him.
Dean slipped his hands to Castiel’s hips and rubbed his thumbs over the beautiful smooth skin there.
Castiel leaned forward and crashed his lips against Dean’s, slowly thrusting his tongue between Dean’s lips. He played with Dean’s tongue, licking and sucking it into his own mouth slowly and sensually as Dean moaned and writhed in passion beneath him. He run his tongue slowly along the inside of Dean’s mouth and bit his bottom lip before crashing their lips together again, kissing his deeply and desperately.
“I am yours Cas…No one is going to take me away from you. I promise.” Dean breathed between kisses and put his hand on Castiel’s chest, running it down his toned stomach to his hard cock. Castiel moved his hands down, pulled Dean’s boxers off in one quick movement and run his hand over Dean’s body slowly.
“You have no idea, how gorgeous you are Dean” he said, voice hoarse, as he reached over to the top drawer of the nightstand to retrieve the bottle of lube. Swallowing roughly, Dean nodded and pulled in a shaky breath. So fucking hot, so beautiful…He was going to miss this, miss Castiel, miss everything…
The snap of the lubricant’s lid opening drew Dean from his thoughts and he smiled up at Castiel as he coated his fingers with lube, rubbing them together to warm it up. His fingers found their way between Dean’s legs and Castiel slipped two fingers in Dean inch by inch and started thrusting his fingers in and out slowly and easily. Dean pushed back on Castiel’s hand, squeezing Castiel’s fingers together.
“Oh God, that feels good”
Castiel thrust his fingers in deep and Dean twisted his hips again, pushing on Castiel’s hand hard, clenching his muscles around his fingers.
It was so hot and tight and Castiel groaned as he slid his finger out of Dean and shifted a little on top of his husband, moving down on his body as he began moving his hips, grinding their cocks together. Instinctively Dean reached down and placed his hands on Castiel’s firm ass, digging his nails into the hot flesh.
Castiel started to slowly rotate his hips, grinding his erection against Dean’s as he leaned forward to brush their noses together. He shifted a little more and started sliding up and down on Dean’s body, rubbing their cocks together slowly but hard, creating a hot friction that made them both moan and gasp.
“Cas…” Dean moaned quietly, and he threw his head back into the pillow, exposing more of his neck. Castiel leaned down and ran his tongue over his neck, sensing the delicate pulsing of Dean’s blood beneath the skin as he licked his way down to his chest and grazed his teeth over Dean’s right nipple as the side of his thumb swept over his left nipple. He gently caught his nipple in his teeth and began rubbing it with his tongue making Dean to cry out in pleasure. He traced his hands over Dean’s abs, biting down to his chest before licking a line up the side of his throat, sucking gently over his pulse. Dean groaned and tilted his head so that Cas would have more access. Wet lips blazed over Dean’s hot skin, Castiel’s tongue dipping into the hollow of his collar-bone, nipping at his shoulder before he ran the tip of his tongue up and down the sensitive skin there, making Dean shiver and moan uncontrollably.
Castiel inhaled sharply, spooning up behind Dean again to rub himself against the curve of his ass. Dean gave a breathy little moan and laced his fingers with Castiel’s, squeezing his hand in a silent plea for more.
Castiel slowly slipped in up to the crown as his breath hitched, biting down on Dean’s shoulder. One slow push more and he was all the way inside Dean, pushing as deep as he could go, wanting to give him more pleasure, as much pleasure as he could stand as he kissed his neck and the side of his face, curling himself around him more. He buried his face in the back of his neck again, thrusting into Dean’s body slowly and sharply. Dean groaned and pressed his body back to Castiel, laying his head back on Castiel’s shoulder, clenching around him tightly. Castiel shuddered, revelling in the perfection of Dean surrounding him and kept thrusting into him keeping the slow pace and moaning softly at the desperate breathy sounds Dean was making.
His breath came deep and heavy, hot in the inch space between them as he run his tongue over Dean’s nape. It felt amazing, almost overwhelmingly so and Castiel slowly began to thrust harder, reaching down to wrap his hand around Dean’s cock and stroke him in time with his thrusts, pressing kisses along the line of Dean’s jaw and down his throat. His thumb brushed away the bead of moisture already forming at the top, spreading it around the head as he pumped up and down his length.
Dean cried out, groaning long and loud, eyes tightly closed and Cas thrust deeply into him, faster and harder, gasping Dean’s name out.
“Cas, I’m close” Dean moaned and Cas picked up speed, moaning and grunting with every thrust.
“So am I” he breathed. Dean’s ass was so hot against his thighs and Castiel pushed harder, driving deeper inside, making Dean groan sharply.
“Don’t stop, fuck, Cas, uh, harder…” Dean pleaded, growled, begged from somewhere deep down where his climax was building.
“I won’t, uh, fuck Dean…Won’t ever stop. Wanna fuck you like this forever, just like this.”
Castiel started stroking Dean harder and faster and continued to thrust up roughly into the willing body in front of him over and over. Moaning loudly, Dean wrapped his fingers around his length; right above Castiel’s, and rolled his ass on Castiel’s cock hungrily.
Fingers laced, they began to jack him off together in time with their fervent rocking as Castiel fucked deep into him at the same time Dean began to moan and clench his ass around his cock.
He squeezed Dean hard, running his long fingers over Dean’s shaft, gripping his cock tightly and stroking faster,until Dean couldn’t take it any longer and finally came letting out a loud and sharp moan, his whole body shaking with pleasure, his cock spasming in orgasmic tension under Castiel’s fingers.
After that, Castiel lasted no more than five or six deep thrusts more before his own orgasm violently tore out of him and blazed until his vision faded out and his muscles locked. There was nothing else to do but grip Dean’s hips tightly, press him to his chest and ride it out.
They stayed just like that, bodies pressed together for what seemed like hours, shivers running along their bodies as they came slowly down from their climax. Castiel let out a breathy little sigh and he pressed a kiss to Dean’s shoulder as he slid out of him slowly. Dean turned around and nuzzled his nose into Castiel’s neck. He grazed his hands down his sides, stopping at Castiel’s hips and rubbing in circular motions with his thumbs before he smoothed his hands up to frame his face in his palms
”I love you…” he whispered and leaned in to press a sweet kiss against his husband’s lips. Castiel wrapped his arms tightly around his shoulders, holding him closer than ever.
“I love you too…Don’t wanna lose you…”
“You are not going to lose me. I am all yours….”
Castiel could only hope that one day Dean would come back home and never leave again. One day it was going to happen and it was going to be the most beautiful day of his life.